neighbours

I dislike you.

I don't care that you're new.

Your existence has me reeling

And it's more than just a feeling.

I know you are stranger but I recognise

Who you are by the look in your eyes.

By the way you lick your teeth ready to bite.

By the hate set in your face that you can't hide.

There's a taste to you even from afar. 

Like nicotine patches, spit and tar.

I smell your fists on the wall that separates us.

I bet you tell people that's the way you love.

I can feel your existence viscerally

In my bones, my stomach, and knocking knees.

In the expectation of sounds and anger.

In the expectation of you shifting like the weather.

Any moment of silence has me holding tight,

Waiting for the moment that you alight.

And there on cue comes the storm

That triggers another trauma response.

The yelping noise 

And violence in your voice.

The sound of landing blows.

You reaching a new low.

That definining moment.

The end of innocence.

You getting your rocks off.

The harm that you cause.

I just want you to know that I hear.

And I want you to know that I am here.

And I want you to know I won't stay silent.

I never promised you obedience, my man.

You might think this is fine. 

It is not and you crossed a line.

My fear won't hold me down.

This is my stand and I won't bow out.