Death never bargains

Although we said goodbye

what felt like a million lifetimes ago,

I think there is a part of me

that just didn't expect 

that this was the end. 

I wasn't waiting around for an invitation

but something in me went, 

I bet one day I'll see you again.

We shared a story 

that spanned many books,

spread out over the decades

like there was always more to tell.

And maybe it was

long and winding

but it was never boring 

and I was captured in it like a spell.

There was love, even when 

our hearts moved in different directions. 

There was care, even when there was not.

That fire we carried was never lost.

There's a part of me that still lives 

where we left off,

despite knowing we would never 

pick up from there again.

I tried to image I had the power

to still time but in the end 

it remained there waiting

right alongside with me,

its companionship constant.

And now, suddenly,

this is the end of the story.

There's nothing more to tell.

It's a comma turning to a full stop.

There was an us and then there's not.

Opportunities lost.

Two becomes one.

Death the great unequaliser. 

I would have gladly sacrificed

all my hope to give you more life,

even if it would have never touched mine, 

but death never bargains.

Ventilator

Zomerhitte.

In de bezwengende momenten.

bezoekt zij al mijn gedachten.

Haar rondingen,

haar lange benen,

de innerwerking van haar brein.

Ik haal alles wat zij is

uit de doos van mijn herinnering. 

Gepassioneerd

maak ik contact met 

haar, en ik voel geen graan van spijt.

De verkoelende lucht 

danst haar vingers over mijn huid

met de kennis van een oude vlam.

De strelingen vinden de kern

van wat ik verlang

tussen mijn dijen.

Ik wou 

dat ik meer kon dichten

maar de zon vraagt al mijn aandacht 

als een jaloerse ex-geliefde.

Sinful love

My eyes will always find her,

even in the most crowded room.

She's like an electric fire,

sending sparks that make me bloom.

Just one look

is enough to make me catch my breath. 

I'm not ashamed to admit 

that I'm a puddle in her hands.

Her lips like cherry

dragging marks all over my skin.

I can taste the divine on her,

I can touch the sacred within.

Her lips like cherry

dragging taste all over my tongue. 

It's right here in this moment

that I know where I belong 

So if love is a sin,

then let the whole world be condemned. 

We can use a little hellfire, 

we can use ways to connect.

If love is a sin,

then let this be the end.

I will bury myself in her heat,

and leave my life in her hands. 

Community

Community 

Their embraces that

smell of alcohol and smoke.

Her smile that

let's me know that I'm home.

It's all I need 

to know:

Sometimes I'm lonely, 

but I am not alone.

I am not alone.

~*~*~*~*~*~

(They are glitter,

euphoria, 

and late night whispers.

They make me shine.)

Stranger

You're too disconnected to empathise.

To buried in ai generated lies.

Academies and maximising. 

Misogyny in a different font.

You're bespittled lips and faux anger.

Somehow thinking that makes you stronger.

Paying out of pocket 

for some piece of advice. 

You don't care that the world is burning, 

as long as you are still earning,

your weight in recognition. 

Real money is too expensive. 

They scream at the skies

And say they're in danger. 

You shrug your shoulders 

And say they're just strangers.

Hmm-mmm hmmm-mmmm 

You let them be strangers.

The world is in pain,

the world is danger. 

You tell me you don't 

recognise yourself in strangers.

Hmmmmm yeah

I'll let you be a stranger. 

Night owl

Night owl 

When the sunset 

hits the trees

my energy rises,

as does my breath,

almost in tandem.

My ears unpop 

after 12o clock,

much like a reverse pumpkin 

out of a fairytale.

The silence is decompressing.

My body relaxes 

and I feel hale.

I crave those moments I have to myself.

That cold night air is intoxicating.

As is the neighbourhood sleeping.

I am alone.

Let sleep take its time to catch me.

I need an hour of reprieve.

The only sound, the sound of you

and I breathing rhythmically.

I can stay, forever, 

just like this

and never get bored.

And never feel unloved. Ever.

Kip/Atilla

Kip/Atilla

Jaren geleden, 

voor de muskus 

zijn afscheiding over twitter liet gaan,

kwam een tweetje van mij 

in een Engels artikel,

en had het ipv hen/hun 

chicken/hun staan.

Misschien is dat

geen gedicht waard 

maar mijn brein leidt een ander leven. 

Want wat is meer non binair 

dan mij opeens de titel 

van een willekeurig object

of een dier te geven?