Goodbye

pt.1 The storm

(Friendships supposed to be build to resist storms)

War is an art
Deprived of all meaning
When matched up with a pen

But none is prepared
For the storm that rages
When friendships come to an end

No middleground
No claims of victory
Perhaps not even a singular truth

Who is the victim
Who plays the perpetrator
Or are both simply misunderstood

This is my story, take it or leave it
I no longer want to drown on these words
You called me paranoid, you called me delusional
Yet judged us on assumptions, leaving nothing unstirred

Had to hide
Had to be silent
But now I will do the talking

There's no sound
There's no vision
Beyond lies you've been spreading

You told the whole world that I am arrogant
That I build castles so I can reach the skies
But I'm still sitting here, legs folded on the floor
Wondering if you truly believe that I'd roll the dice

7 years
Only left you
Wondering about the why

But not me
I do understand
That the time spend was no lie

Pt 2: The Reality

(Do you still think you're better than me)

To you I am the villain in this classic drama
That's the role you gave me deep inside your head
But you are only the victim of your own doing
Yet you still dream of the applause you will get

Your goodbyes you said in vicious manner
You told me nothing and pushed me to the ground
Veiling insecurities under layers of arrogance
Blaming me for words coming out of your own mouth

Never once
Will you admit
That you might be wrong
But it's no secret
I guess I knew that all along

Ignorance is all that some will show me
Judging me without knowing the person that I became
They'll assume you're righteously telling the truth
Because I wasn't willing or able to play your little game

Changing words
And alter the past
Nothing you see as holy
Bathing yourself
In the blood of our memories

I am weary
Of pointed fingers
Judgmental and inane
So I leave this stage
There's nothing left to gain

pt3: The Silence

There was nothing left
No us at all
For that one moment
Words were too elusive
Too heavily written and unable to mend
As I could not give
More of me
Did you dislike the mirror I became
Or did you blow the image away
So you could say I'm too blame
For the walls I showed and the trust I didn't break
I didn't want to be put up to the test
How much more did you think I could take
I could feel myself grow colder
For you, by you
Drained by your hand
Confusing one change with another
But I got tired of your violent demands
Silencing the whispering noises
In the shadows
So you branded me as more than a culprit
Accused me of some hideous crime
Declared my silence evidence for it
A lovely show that wiped your conscious clean
Something I didn't fail to understand
That side of you is one that can not ever be unseen

(The silence deafened your ears
Yet noise arose inside my head
While the days were ticking away
Words started to form
But not one of them was breathed onto you)

pt 4: The History

You fill the gaps in your mind with false guesses and lies
Sell it to the world as truth, after you said goodbye
Do you think that has any meaning at all
Claiming no damage after our fall
You are not me

The emotions you don't understand are only for me to see
You never bothered to ask if I looked at you differently
This silence will soon fade into yesterday
Any pain I feel was not meant to stay
And I'm not suffering

I won't let your lack of self-reflection haunt me anymore
Because I won't wait outside a closed door
The way you silenced me, and this ending
Was played out as if I meant nothing
So nothing I shall be (to you)

pt5: Fade out

You were important once, for me

"I have no final words for this,
For I need none.
One day I'll find that I'll already laid the book to rest.
In the end, I guess you never understood me,
Or you never understood my life wasn't yours to live.
You never gave me time to rest my mind,
But it doesn't matter now.
The paint isn't dry on the canvas of my life,
And I am not done painting.
As it comes to you and I;
We were two leafs on the wind.
For a moment we brushed passed each other,
And when the wind changed directions,
So did we."