Losing my mind

I remember the days that I was blind,
I was drowning in a blink of an eye.
The days turned into weeks and I never noticed
How time can pass you by.
And now that I am here, I don't feel safe.
What can I trust, what of this is real.
I watched all my dreams shatter before my eyes,
And I don't know how to feel.

It's scratching on the walls inside of me,
I fear that I am losing my mind again.
A veil falls before my eyes and I'm not myself anymore,
Too weak to take a stand.
It feels like I am falling away from the earth
And from everything that I hold dear
I don't want to be this insane, to feel like everything's in vain
But I am intoxicated with the fear.

What will happen to the life I want to lead
If I have to start at the beginning once more?
I thought I was starting to believe in myself this time,
But old scars are closing the door.
Do I need to chain myself to the silence?
My head is too crowded for me to live in.
I am trying so hard to drown all the noise and all the pain.
Where's the end to the beginning?

So I stand tall and fake the most perfect smile,
But it still feels like I am made of glass
And I will shatter in an instance, right before their eyes.
Unaware of how long I will last.