What doesn´t kill me costs 1 pound at the 7/11

I still don´t understand

How it got so out of hand

And the blame was enough to go around.

And I still don´t get

How you fill in what I said

Even when I never made a sound.

I still don´t understand

How we got from this argument

Into a world where we just point fingers.

And I still this stinging pain

When I remember how it all played

Out and the truth never seems to linger.

But I have no doubt

I am not the one to open my mouth

And turn the tables around

Until we all can peacefully sit down.

But even though I miss

Out on what was us and what is,

I can no longer fathom to film

The reality beyond reality cause it will.

Kill me.

Yes, it will kill me.

I still didn´t say the words

You so ademently said you heard,

I did not turn this into a game of bad guys.

And I still see, see the truth,

How you not see the things I do,

Turn back into your worlds and call mine lies.

You shoved words into mouths,

Explanations, reasons, things that were

Done that got another frame of looking at it

And I am not sure

How all the things you turn to,

Twist into something else, doubts perhaps

About the truthfullness of the simplicity

Of the words that were actually said.

I was not allowed to have a problem with anything,

Case solved. Prosecution rest.

You did not mean to, I know you didn´t.

But you did, and never opened your eyes to any of it.

You saw not me talking about an issue but an attack.

Even though every time you tell me off

I don´t assume a knife in my back.

Why am I not allow to point out something?

Anything?

Can I say nothing?

I want to say something.

But I have no energy

To fight a battle if it seems

To end up hopeless hopelessly

And it will tear right down in the heart of me.

But even if I might cry

And somedays it feels like I will die,

I find these days that I smile,

Even though your choice was not mine,

It was not mine.

It might not kill me after all.

For I rather die

Then bend my head before your eyes

Bend my truth before your wrongheld beliefs.

I am a lot but not a thief

To my own brand of sanity.

You are not a bad person,

You are wrong and misinformed,

Never really tried to listen to my words.

Never really tried to see it my way before

And after this.

Never tried it after this.

Never tried it after this.

Never tried it after this.

It might not kill me but occasionally it hurts like hell…

(And I still don´t understand)