Grab it not

No, ´Grab me by the pussy is not a joke,

It is not locker room talk, no Alpha male stuff,

I was only 6 years old.

Let it sink in.

6 years. Old.

Or young.

When a male Alpha´ed his less than whatever

is the last Greek letter in that Alphabet behaviour

On my itty bitty self.

My crime for being female.

My punishment for being a child.

You don´t say it´s toxic masculinity

When you dare open your mouth and blame me

For being raped when I was nothing more than a baby,

Not an adult in any

Sense of the word.

Or make excuses for their behaviour.

Tell me men do not know better.

The fact that you think you need to make excuses, tells me,

Men know better but they just don´t care.

Or when I am again sexually assaulted and

A bit after that again raped and

Abused and beaten by different men.

Could you not hoover over these predators and say:

“This is bullshit. No man should behave this way.

And no man held to normal standards of humanity does.”

Instead you say:

“How could you let it happen it to you again?

How could you let yourself get into harms way?”

As if I had a choice in the matter,

As if 50% of the world is not basically populated with men,

And you all are kinda hard to avoid

Or ignore

Or open about the fact whether you are a rapist or not.

And when I assume you are not, I am too trustworthy.

And when I assume you are, I am not trustworthy enough.

I can´t win.

I am the sum of my parts and nothing,

No nothing

More.

I am a pussy to grab,

A boob to lick,

A back to throw against the wall,

A head to smash against the pavement.

And when one of my assailants

Suddenly becomes a neighbour

You ask me why I smile when I see him in the hallway,

You ask why I just didn´t move

House

As if I could move.

10 years after he threw me on the ground

And I still could not move.

How symbolic.

I almost locked myself up inside my house,

A little scared and angry mouse

Flinching when I heard his voice on the balcony.

No ´grab my pussy´ is not a joke.

It´s toxic masculinity.

There are so many women in this world,

We walk amongst you all with secrets in our hearts.

Scars and wounds of predatory behaviour

And it will be a start, just a start

If you could understand

That this all starts with men

And yes all so women,

Who think

That someone saying that grabbing a pussy

Without consent

Is a joke

And not a worry

For every women you have ever seen.

I was raped. I was maybe broken,

Maybe damaged, maybe anything when they got to me,

But I was not weak,

And I was not the blame.

I was just a paw in a game,

So feel ashamed,

For talking this way.

I will no longer feel shame for the way I got treated

And maybe one time I will dare stand up

And walk over to look you in the eye

When you joke about grabbing a pussy, A D-cup,

A whatever the fuck without consent and ask you

To try again, I dare you to touch me while not having my consent.

But until then,

You are the idiot womenhater who lets a man

Grabbing your daughters vagina without your consent

Run for president.