Through the air

I was edged in your name.

I was edged in your life.

But your truth that now remains

Is no truth of mine.

I tried, and tried in vain

To dispel what you said I said

Which I said no times, not the same

And without your words.

For me it was not about blame,

But about being heard and understood.

To unrevel the blemishes and stains,

To again see eye to eye

And when I extended my hands to you

Through the sky,

You just slapped them away, turned your backs,

No goodbyes.

As if my tears were never crying.

You told the world that it was me who left,

In smoke of silence,

While you pretended my nonexistence,

I ignored it in defiance.

You plead the 5th, you plead ignorance.

But if it is you who left you and not I who left you

(Anything other than bereaved),

Why do you expect that it be me who chases you

(To the edge of eternity)?

It is that simple and it is less than what you make of it.

And maybe we need to talk about the shoe that fits.

I don´t think you´re “the bad guy”

You´re just misunderstood

And you twisted my words

And the letters you took.

I never said you ever

Did everything

Wrong!

Or was every time you scolded me

A reflection of what you,

You thought of me

And the things I do?

Always,

Eternally?

Internally?

Now when in suddentity one thing seems to define us all,

I can´t find myself waiting on the other side of the wall.

When everything turns Berlin, willing-ly.

It is not my world to force myself upon,

If with every turn you make,

You tell me you do not want me there,

And on face value I take

The words and actions you provided me with

So be clear and surely be true.

Because that is the way that I breathe,

That is the thing I do.

Because actions speak louder than words

And your words are all unspoken.

I once thought we were more than bloodties,

But more now seems easily broken.

Well I have to tell you blood runs thicker than water and

That blood still run thinner than a foundation properly cemented.

One little thing and it floats away,

One toe out of line,

One negative thing to say

Is enough to leave me declined

Like I was never

Worth the effort

From the start,

Just because of that single moment,

Me telling you instead of you me,

That this made me feel wrong.

It was not my final decree.

This aftermath

Still seems to

Confuse me.

But paint me like a bad guy if you want,

As I pose for you, throw my hands in the air.

I extended my hands through space and time,

But I stopped trying when I stopped finding you there.