I fell into depression
On the sound of music
And my community dying.
I fell into the words
Of people with thick
Lies who made me disppear.
I fell into love
And into hate
And into …..
I still don’t know.
2020 isn’t over.
The clock says it is
But it is lying.
We are still here where we always were.
Put your fireworks in a box.
We are not there yet
Cause your last shred of humanity is also dying.
We need to count its body to the dead.
We are sleeping.
On the truth.
On the words.
On the pain.
We are sleeping.
On being heroes.
On being hopeful
While it rains.
While it rains
The arrows
Of people
Telling all the lies.
And the hope
To turn them
Into a silence
For a little while.
For a little while
I want you
To consider
Seeing us alive.
Cause if you
Don't, I fear
More of us
Will die.
You don’t have to try to shrink me.
I won’t fit in your pill.
So you won’t fit me on your magazine cover,
In your clothing stores
Or on the medical bills.
You won’t give me healthcare,
Cause my care is tied
To a shrinking body.
I have gotten used to health
Being something that’s denied.
You will tell me I will be pretty
If I only lost the weight.
And tell me about the pants
That doesn’t fit, like
It’s my body type you hate.
And you do all these things
And so much more, unprovoked.
I wish you realised what
You are saying but I know
That you won’t.
We zijn het ondergeschoven kindje,
We zijn de blik die je niet werp.
Ik vraag mij af, wat bezint je
Terwijl je over onze lichamen stampt?
Zijn wij dan nu al vergeten?
Nee nee dat is het niet.
Je vergeet alleen wat je kon weten,
En je herinnerde ons nooit niet.
We waren heel stil
De slachtoffers van jouw feesten
En de onderwerp van jouw luide onwil.
We waren de reden
Voor al jouw problemen
En van iedereen in de wereld.
We waren verschenen
In jouw hemel als een komeet
Die je liever uit de lucht schoot.
We waren onderwerp van
Jouw gesprekken waarin jij aanbood
Dat we liever dood moesten.
Je betichtte ons van ego
En alleen aan onszelf denken.
Maar nu je kans heb op een boot
Weg van dit alles, ben je enkel jezelf aan het redden.
En we worden weer weggeschoven,
Vergeten, achter in de rij gezet.
Zodat je kan vergeten of wij dood
Zijn of leven, en je terug kan naar je feesten.
Toen we GeenDorHout riepen knikte je mee.
Maar nu de mogelijkheid is een zeis te pakken
Hak je ons af onder de knie.
Wie gaat er voor egoisme ook al weer?
When I look at the movies,
Is shrunken women and
Space taking men
And I am nowhere to be seen.
Representation makes happy.
It is this visceral need.
And I learned to love my body
By seeing people just like me.
Sometimes I wish
I was born with more hands,
Some I can conjure
Right on demand.
But most of the time
I just wish I could rest
To stop putting
My body to the test
Of fitting into
Society’s demands,
Who all wish I was
Born with more hands.
To those
Who didn't pay attention,
To those
Who said: both sides the same.
To those
Who kept making excuses.
And those
Who gave it their okay.
To those
Who stood by him
And those
Who are him with another name.
To those
Who told us to be patient,
Your name is
Written on this day.
If you are happy
And you know it
You have not been
Paying attention
To the fabric
Of the universe tearing open
And violence spilling out.
All of it able to be
Hiding in plain sight
Cause we were not
Paying attention.
That and you probably
Had way more tea
Than me.
My body is not invitation
Not a landing zone for your remarks,
For your unwanted advice,
Your threats.
Yeah
I'm not your mark.
No more fingers
In my thigh dimples, or stark
Contrast comparisons.
With your healthy ass legs
Cause no
I'm not your mark.
"You should diet" slides
Off my belly into the dark.
Together with " Why a
Wheelchair if you
Can walk? Damn!
I'm not your mark.
You can kiss goodbye
Calling my lardass or aardvark.
Or fake disabled, or lazy.
You can kiss it away
Kissing my butt.
Will never be your mark
#SpreekJeUitBekenKleur,
Open je ogen
Voor wat te lang gebeurde.
Zie de mensen
Te lang vergeten
Samen komen en weet
Dat zij een doel hebben gevonden
Een community,
Een gedeelde smart in oude wonden,
En nieuwe, en ongehoorde.
De maatschappij,
Die ze te lang niet hoorden.
#SpreekJeUitBekenKleur
En zelfs al open je niet de deur
Voor hen, ze komen binnen.
Ik stem Bij1
I have been balling my fists
And I have been fighting.
With tears on my cheek,
I have been crying.
Wondered if my friends
Might soon be dying.
For 10 months
I have been watching.
How with hook, line and
Sinker, they've been talking.
Reeling us in on lies
They are spreading.
The wares they got,
They are selling,
I don’t want it
But you’re demanding
That I take it cause I'm a burden.
So you're killing me here
And you’re laughing.
My death is
Having you smiling.
My body is
The thing you're hiding.
So you could be
Denying,
You don’t know
What you are doing.
This page in history
Is burning.
Mijn stem doet ook mee,
Ik ben niet stil.
Sterke meningen
En sterke wil.
Woorden sterven
Zelden op mijn tong.
Ik ben wat ik ben
En waar ik voor op kom.
Maar er zitten altijd
Handen op mijn mond,
Die proberen te doen
Alsof ik nooit bestond.
Trekken de stem
Uit de diepte uit van mijn keel,
Uit mijn handen,
En mijn wil.
Stop! Stop!
Ik heb recht op mijn woorden
En je kan niet doen
Alsof je mij niet kan horen.
Ik tel ook mee,
En ik heb een stem.
Geef mijn recht op mijn recht
Terug en wen
Aan dat ik je pijn
Niet langer accepteer.
Geef mijn stem terug,
En steel het nooit meer.
bij1.org/iktelookmee
Today
I am made of pain.
Happy smiles,
And tears like rain.
Optimism
And negative voices.
Hope that
Runs dry and stained.
I might be
Afraid,
That all this come together
Ends up in vain.
That everything I do
Goes down the drain.
Still I keep fighting
With happy smiles
And tears like rain.
We are all puppets
In this puppetshow.
Strings
Attached to hips
And sunken into our bones.
Front seats,
Drunken treats,
To put down our stones.
Sunken mentality,
Smiles covered in snow.
You are buried
On the bottom of the sea.
You stopped seeing
What the water is doing.
And when it comes to a we,
You stopped caring
A long time ago.
So will you just let it be?
The status quo
To eternity?
But you better
Let me add my voice
Into the myriad of voices
That had enough.
Don’t take my choice.
I want to
Lift us up
And I want to hoist
The flag onto a future
In which we all matter.
